The GIRL is tired today, very tired. She almost fell asleep driving on the highway. This is not good because she didn’t even bring me out with them today. She said, “Doodle, you need a break, stay home.” Time changes are always a mess for the boy and difficult for the GIRL. She says that over the years with the BOY she has probably lost over 252,000 hours of sleep and that doesn’t include the time change hours that she lost, that is just mom of autism lack of sleep.
The BOY doesn’t adapt well to time changes. His biological clock stays true and on fall -back time he is up by 4am raring to go through the day like a bull in a china shop. That means breakfast should be within an hour and lunch a couple hours after. The GIRL has finally figured out through the years on the fall back time to give him snacks throughout the day so he keeps food in his belly and doesn’t get super cranky. Sometimes it works other times it’s a failure. Today wasn’t bad, but anything was an improvement from yesterday.
About 2 months ago, I started doing this blog and then started a facebook page. The GIRL was not in the best frame of mind when I started all of this, but day-by-day as she peeked over my paws she saw something and I saw something in her.
You see the GIRL has been working in the field of autism ever since the BOY was diagnosed. Yup, she eats, breathes and lives autism, and has done so for a LONG time (I think it’s why she gets a little cranky time-to-time), actually about 24 years now. She has worked doing one thing or another and truth be told she was really starting to lose appreciation for many parents. She was finding too many parents looking to blame others for their child’s issues and looking for others to “fix” their child and if they didn’t “fix them” throw an attitude that the person or place isn’t doing their job. She was finding too many parents that were constantly demanding more supports and services of her when she was doing well over the top of what one human could do and it still wasn’t enough for them, BUT they would refuse to step up to the plate to offer help when she would ask. They just wanted her to do all the work. They gave her excuses like, they were tired (hello), they had a child with autism (hello), they had a job (hello), it was too far to drive (hello she drove there) and they didn’t have the money (hello), or they were a single parent, how could a single parent help (HELLO AGAIN). She was finding too many parents not wanting to face the reality of the diagnosis and too many wanting everything in life for free because they had a child with autism (she really hates that). She was just getting burnt out and was still trying to bring herself and the BOY back together from losing the BOY’s dad. Needless to say the last 2 years has been an over the top struggle for the GIRL and she knew it.
BUT……..then she found them from looking over my paws. The parents from all over the world that are out there speaking up, banding together to provide for one another. They provide arms to hug with, shoulders to cry on, hands to pick one up, tissues for tears, laugher when needed and hearts to love with. These are the thousands of moms and dads that she has found through my blog and facebook. They are there. They are not looking to blame. They are not asking for free stuff every minute. They are not demanding her to do more. They are just there. There to let her know once again she is not alone and we are all on this same damn boat floating out in the sea looking for a captain who can tell us where the hell we are going.
Some of our friends are going to bed when we wake up while others are battling autism battles and rights with schools, while some are struggling to just keep their child safe from harming themselves and some waiting for that one word. The best part is almost all of them do it with humor….humor because we all have learned that it is easier to laugh and if we didn’t laugh we would never make it day after day after day. They try to make each other laugh and sometimes it’s a humor that only they get because it’s there side of normal that most other people don’t get.
It’s almost as if it’s a language of it’s own. Perhaps it is AUTIELANG or something, but whatever it is, it gives them all a peace within. A peace that others know, understand, support and love. It gives a peace that someone is always there no matter if it’s the middle of the night and you’re awake due to autism not sleeping or a bad night, someone is always there to laugh, cry, pick you up or hold you.
It’s their world……a very special world to be in with a language of it’s own. A world where only the strong survive with bangs and bumps, but survive. The GIRL is happy to be a part of such a beautiful place with so many wonderful people.
The Doodle is honored and pleased to be a friend of each and every one. If you want to meet some really cool, awesome autism heroes go to my facebook page and check out my likes. Tell them the Doodle sent you. They are all better than best and will make your day that much better.
Be kind support autism peace hugs love a doodle. The doodle loves you.