Autism Wears Blue Suede Shoes

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So you think you should be wearing these blue shoes of mine do you? I’ll gladly allow you to put them on if you feel you need them.

I’m sure after a mile or two you’ll find they definitely aren’t the right pair for you even if they are your size.

Yes, I know you think that blue shoes are special and they are the thing to own and you’re jealous when you see them on me and you wish to the moon and back that they were yours, but like I said before, you will probably only get a mile or two and they’ll start to really hurt and you’ll gladly give them back.

You see these are my blue worn shoes and only I have learned to wear them through pain and years. Yeah, yeah, I’m sure you think you can handle them just fine and would wear them so much better than I. So I guess it’s one for the money two for the show
. Three to get ready now go, cat, go.

I know you are so jealous of these blue suede shoes I wear. You think to yourself they are the most beautiful shoes you have ever seen. What soles they have for their age… and how graceful they move through the day. They must fit perfectly, after all the GIRL is always smiling who wears them, and she knows everything. She works right in the blue suede factory.

Yes, life in those blue suede shoes must…

no it has it to be PeRfeCt.

If only I had them my life could be too……

I do think you should know that some days the pain with them is intolerable. I am grateful that I have learned to just sit back….

take them off

and put up my feet to think that this moment in time shall pass too.

When you have finally learned to wear blue suede shoes as one should… you learn….It’s all moments of time and they all pass…….. some just take a little longer than others. So I sit and wait….and you learn…. You learn to some days …. never put those shoes ….and other days you wear them all day….. with a smile

Stories are stories, we heard them since childhood. They are embedded within our minds. Because the prince always saves the princess especially when the shoe fits.

But…..I stand within these shoes to say the shoe may fit but you may not be able to walk all day in them…..so please don’t just judge by the shoe or the smile…..it truly doesn’t resemble what it all’s about or how an individual may have the ability to hide the pain or walk the walk everyday, every hour.

Oh, by the way please don’t step on my blue suede shoes. I truly can’t take on another load. I may have a smile but that’s not really what is inside…..You see some of those indentations on those shoes are from people stepping on them everyday and everyone continues in their own way so please…. hear my pleas and lay off of my blue suede shoes. Really this is not a quest it’s a plea. I am old, so are my shoes, and so is my soul. Your eyes may tell you something different when you look but…please don’t….. I honestly can’t handle more….my back is becoming weak…my heart hurts and my soul is tired, so please don’t step on my blue suede shoes…

The spots….what are the spots?……those my friend ….those are the tears that I cry almost everyday asking G-D for the strength to continue to wear shoes of such beauty….because I know the strength and the quality of these shoes….and most important…..I believe…..

I believe that ANYTHING in these shoes is possible with love, patient, tolerance, support and more love…it is ALWAYS POSSIBLE…

The discoloration….oh well…that’s just trying to squeeze through situations where you are so frighten that you leave scrape marks on the side.. trying to gracefully get through…or from the night that you just continued to ask for one more knowing you were safe with the people you where with to get you home… just to kill the pain that you where feeling for weeks or months and somehow, someway without anyone really knowing you just had to get it out even if it wasn’t who you are and had to stab it even if it meant that you couldn’t put the shoes on for two days later and the people you spent that time with never really know who you were…..even if you wanted them to.

Yes, I wear these shoes. I wear them everyday and I love these shoes more than anyone can ever love a life, but G-D sometimes they hurt so bad and make me wonder …….CAN I really continue to keep these shoes.

Oh that dent in the side…..well that was just like any other morning and it was either I hurt the one I love or slam into the wall….I choose the other as always….they are only shoes…they are older….they can take the slams….The one I love is just trying to make it his own way through the day…

They may not appear as what they really are. You see I truly love these blue suede shoes and yes I know they are a gift from G-D, so I treasure them every moment of every day, but some days they are just harder to wear than others, so please bear me the moment to adjust to the extra discomfort on any particular day and again please don’t step on my blue suede shoes. I am doing the very best I can……can you not see…..

The soles ….oh yes they are very aged ….years of day in and day out of trials and tribulations ….people always continue to provide their input for what will work….BUT they don’t wear these shoes….they really don’t know….I am sorry blue suede shoes just don’t fit like others…..they are different…

And I stand as strong as I can say G-D,   “well, you can knock me down, step in my face
 Slander my name all over the place 
Do anything that you want to do 
But G-D, please let the people lay off of my blue suede shoes

Please understand the wearer is only human…. doing the best they can…and so grateful that you have finally taught us to ask……and ask…..and even beg if we have to….we love these shoes…..we love them with them with every breath…because we know…we know every spot, every crinkle, every mark, every dent…every thing about them…they are mine…they are love…they are life… they are you…G-D….give them the chance…..to dance!

peace love hugs a doodle…support autism…

Mind-blindness and Empty Shelves in the Autism House

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Well this morning began almost like any other typical morning in our home. The BOY was up at 5:07am, dressed by 5:11am, and the washing machine was running a load by 5:13am. Here is where the almost comes in. The dishwasher was not concurrently running with the washing machine. For a moment I thought, what the heck is the BOY ill today, and then I quickly recalled the flood we had yesterday from the dishwasher. That’s a whole different story. So this morning was almost like any other morning in our home before 5:30am minus the chug, squirt, swish sound of the dishwasher.

The BOY was in his giddy little mood this morning and even though he appeared to be happy on the outside I know as a doodle knows not to ‘look’ at him because that happy moment is GONE. The BOY has 2 standard morning moods GIDDY or HORRID.

NEVER STARE AT THE BOY IN THE MORNING. Oh heck, never stare at the BOY anytime. It pisses him off. Sometimes I do it just to piss him off. Hey, what can I say a doodle gets bored too.

The GIRL gets up, throws on some clothes to take me out for a little relief. It’s Monday and I personally dig Mondays. Mondays means garbage. (Yes, I say garbage but to the BOY it’s trash) I love going out and taking my sweet butt doodle time sniffing everyone’s garbage along the way. You know it’s the best way to find things out about your neighbors. The GIRL doesn’t get it. I actually know that the best way to the guy’s heart across the street is by tuna.  I dig tuna, so I always have to take extra long on his trash. As we walk along lifting legs on everyone’s trash, I’m thinking BOOYAH life is good. The air is crisp this morning and I’m managing to pee on almost everyone’s can or bag out there today. Oh, I should clarify the GIRL does not lift her leg. She actually yells at me for lifting my leg on everyone’s garbage and attempts to drag me along to move a bit faster, but I’m never in a hurry on Mondays.

We return from our walk and the GIRL gets her exercise on. She gets on this damn machine that makes some horrible noise, plugs these strange things in her ears and goes pretty darn fast for like 30 minutes. Personally, I don’t get it , what the heck is she trying to do. She doesn’t go anywhere and to think she doesn’t want to sniff trash with me. HUMANS….

We eat our breakfast…..well the GIRL and I do. The BOY typically takes 2-4 bites and says, “YUCK, I hate this, this is gross, besides I’m not hungry. My stomach is making that grrrrrr sound.” He then stomps up from the table and throws out whatever he is eating and the GIRL and I finish our breakfast.

This almost normal morning the GIRL went to get in the shower and realized she didn’t have any soap. Now I have to give credit where credit is due, the GIRL has become rather thrifty with money since it has become a shortage. She coupons, watches the sales, and gets some really awesome bargains. The GIRL stocks many things that we all use on a regular basis like soap, shampoo, deodorant, toothpaste, lotion, tissues, toilet paper…you get it. I mean she’s not a hoarder but she keeps about 2-3 months of most things stocked and buys them on sale with coupons to help us stay within budget.

Out to the garage she ventures to find the shelf where the soap is EMPTY. Yes, I wrote EMPTY. At first she thought she was looking on the wrong shelf because there was plenty there just last week. She looks again and now starts looking at me, like what the heck did you do with the soap and I’m like hey don’t look at me I prefer to never bath remember and Doodle’s don’t eat that crap.

She starts to look further. Oh no the deodorant is GONE.

What NO SHAMPOO.

TOOTHPASTE GONE…….and then it hits her.

The storage shelves are ALL EMPTY and suddenly she hears that little voice in the back of her mind and it’s the BOY saying just last week he didn’t like that toothpaste. In fact he told her that a couple of times not only about toothpaste but he mentioned he didn’t like the green shampoo nor the blue deodorant. The GIRL just wasn’t really listening.

So here we are now the cupboards are BARE and all I am thinking is thank goodness the BOY doesn’t do anything that involves doodle snacks. I went to check just to make sure. I am safe.

So our almost typical Monday ended up in a money saved money tossed and tomorrow will be another day with locks on the supplies type of day.

GIRL: BOY, I do believe we will be implementing a new program here. You cannot just throw things out that you don’t like.

BOY: of course I can. I don’t like it. I don’t want it.

GIRL: it doesn’t work that way

BOY: yes it does

DOODLE: GIRL give it up the BOY already did it so YES IT DOES.

That’s our BOY. Mind-blindness sorta goes with autism for the most part and the GIRL is not fond of it this almost typical day.

 Lesson Learned by GIRL:  Always LISTEN TO THE BOY. ALWAYS

Be kind, love peace hug a doodle. Support autism.

Yes, Autism Does Have a Language and LOTS OF FRIENDS

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The GIRL is tired today, very tired. She almost fell asleep driving on the highway. This is not good because she didn’t even bring me out with them today. She said, “Doodle, you need a break, stay home.” Time changes are always a mess for the boy and difficult for the GIRL. She says that over the years with the BOY she has probably lost over 252,000 hours of sleep and that doesn’t include the time change hours that she lost, that is just mom of autism lack of sleep.

The BOY doesn’t adapt well to time changes. His biological clock stays true  and on fall -back time he is up by 4am raring to go through the day like a bull in a china shop. That means breakfast should be within an hour and lunch a couple hours after. The GIRL has finally figured out through the years on the fall back time to give him snacks throughout the day so he keeps food in his belly and doesn’t get super cranky. Sometimes it works other times it’s a failure.  Today wasn’t bad, but anything was an improvement from yesterday.

About 2 months ago, I started doing this blog and then started a facebook page. The GIRL was not in the best frame of mind when I started all of this, but day-by-day as she peeked over my paws she saw something and I saw something in her.

You see the GIRL has been working in the field of autism ever since the BOY was diagnosed. Yup, she eats, breathes and lives autism, and has done so for a LONG time (I think it’s why she gets a little cranky time-to-time), actually about 24 years now. She has worked doing one thing or another and truth be told she was really starting to lose appreciation for many parents. She was finding too many parents looking to blame others for their child’s issues and looking for others to “fix” their child and if they didn’t “fix them” throw an attitude that the person or place isn’t doing their job. She was finding too many parents that were constantly demanding more supports and services of her when she was doing well over the top of what one human could do and it still wasn’t enough for them, BUT they would refuse to step up to the plate to offer help when she would ask. They just wanted her to do all the work. They gave her excuses like, they were tired (hello), they had a child with autism (hello), they had a job (hello), it was too far to drive (hello she drove there) and they didn’t have the money (hello), or they were a single parent, how could a single parent help (HELLO AGAIN). She was finding too many parents not wanting to face the reality of the diagnosis and too many wanting everything in life for free because they had a child with autism (she really hates that). She was just getting burnt out and was still trying to bring herself and the BOY back together from losing the BOY’s dad.  Needless to say the last 2 years has been an over the top struggle for the GIRL and she knew it.

BUT……..then she found them from looking over my paws. The parents from all over the world that are out there speaking up, banding together to provide for one another. They provide arms to hug with, shoulders to cry on, hands to pick one up, tissues for tears, laugher when needed and hearts to love with. These are the thousands of moms and dads that she has found through my blog and facebook. They are there. They are not looking to blame. They are not asking for free stuff every minute. They are not demanding her to do more. They are just there. There to let her know once again she is not alone and we are all on this same damn boat floating out in the sea looking for a captain who can tell us where the hell we are going.

Some of our friends are going to bed when we wake up while others are battling autism battles and rights with schools, while some are struggling to just keep their child safe from harming themselves and some waiting for that one word. The best part is almost all of them do it with humor….humor because we all have learned that it is easier to laugh and if we didn’t laugh we would never make it day after day after day. They try to make each other laugh and sometimes it’s a humor that only they get because it’s there side of normal that most other people don’t get.

It’s almost as if it’s a language of it’s own. Perhaps it is AUTIELANG or something, but whatever it is, it gives them all a peace within. A peace that others know, understand, support and love. It gives a peace that someone is always there no matter if it’s the middle of the night and you’re awake due to autism not sleeping or a bad night, someone is always there to laugh, cry, pick you up or hold you.

It’s their world……a very special world to be in with a language of it’s own. A world where only the strong survive with bangs and bumps, but survive. The GIRL is happy to be a part of such a beautiful place with so many wonderful people.

The Doodle is honored and pleased to be a friend of each and every one. If you want to meet some really cool, awesome autism heroes go to my facebook page and check out my likes. Tell them the Doodle sent you. They are all better than best and will make your day that much better.

Be kind support autism peace hugs love a doodle. The doodle loves you.

Autism Storms the House

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It was a difficult day for all of us. The weather was beautiful and the GIRL had big plans for all of us to spend most of the day outside enjoying it, BUT autism got in the way today and we spent most of the day being quiet and trying to ride out the autism storm that was brewing inside the BOY.

The BOY has been doing GREAT. We have had very few eruptions in the last several weeks. Just the other day at the doctor’s office the GIRL said we were all doing awesome. Perhaps she spoke to soon, perhaps the change in the weather is just too much for the BOY.

As any other Saturday the BOY was up bright-eyed and busy tailed well before 6am. The GIRL and I decided to hang around in bed for a while enjoying the cool crisp morning air. We finally got out of bed around 7:15am. This seemed to start the hurricane within the BOY. The GIRL is assuming he wanted us up earlier so he could come in the GIRL’s room to collect her clothing from the day before and night so he could start his Saturday laundry.

Agitation begins.

The GIRL and I go out for our morning walk. I was loving life today. It was cool and I was frisky. YAHOO. We are gonna go out all day. The GIRL was feeling good too in the crisp weather. We took a 2 mile walk and returned home.

The BOY was dress like it was ten below outside and he informed the GIRL it was cold outside and the GIRL said, “well it’s not really cold it’s CHILLY.”

Lava building up quickly to spill over!!!! OH NO…NOT CHILLY.

The BOY then starts to perseverate that it is not CHILLY it is COLD. 10, 20, 50, 100 times he repeats this and starts his over correction with the GIRL and ordering her to say things the way he wants them said. YES, you read it right he says, “I order you to say…….”. The GIRL always replies with the only ORDERING done around here is in a restaurant and we aren’t in a restaurant.

Me, I’m hanging out by the front door. The GIRL has it open with a gate in front for the cool, crisp, clean air to come in the house and oh the neighbors are doing a garage sale. There were a lot of new cars pulling up and lots of strange people walking very close to my door and I thought I should probably bark at those humans, after all they could be coming to harm the GIRL and the BOY.

ERUPTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The BOY begins smacking himself in the head, calling me a stupid idiot, the GIRL, his when really angry, GOAT FACE and smashing his hand on the table, sofa and throwing the stuff on the coffee table.

Now usually I go in on these storms and I can stop him but today, well I just knew it was too bad a storm and if I went in I probably would not have come out. So the GIRL and I backed off. The GIRL instructed him to go to the other room to relax.

It GOT WORSE.

He continued to hit himself in the head, break the bed, rip the stuff off the wall and scream at the top of his lungs. I was like GIRL we have to go in and she said, “NO, he needs to calm, we can get hurt.”

Calming in our house typically is to shut down things that stimulate senses. So off goes the TV and I don’t bark and the GIRL doesn’t talk. We become QUIET.

QUIET BRING CALM.

About an hour later the BOY was somewhat calm. Three hours later we decided to try to run some errands. It wasn’t the worse day we had out, but it wasn’t pleasant either. The GIRL knew the BOY was on the edge of eruption the mere 2 hours we were out so not wanting another storm of such magnitude we came home.

It appears that the weather always has an effect on the BOY. Maybe it’s the sensory thing of going from shorts to pants. We live in Florida, so most of our year we are in shorts. Maybe he doesn’t like the feel of that and it just makes everything else harder to deal with on a daily basis. Maybe it was because yesterday was Halloween and he hates Halloween. He wishes that someone, somewhere, somehow would steal this holiday and never brings it back. Sometimes these eruptions are from things in the past that he just runs over and over in his mind until he breaks. We never know. 

Each day is a new day. Life isn’t always as we plan it but we always try to make the best of each of our days. Thank goodness for tomorrows.

 

Horrid Halloween and Autism

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As a Doodle, I take my job very seriously. I was brought into this dysfunctional family to protect and guide and that is what I will continue to do…..no matter what. Mr Store Manager, Sir, Don’t you Understand, Halloween can be confusing to a doodle who has to protect.

Sunday, just like every other Sunday the GIRL, the BOY and me, the Doodle, load into our little car with me jammed in the back seat and the BOY complaining that I’m to close to him…. head out to do our Sunday errands. Grocery shopping, lunch, and today we decided it was a beautiful Fall feeling day so we were going to the Home Décor store to get some Fall decorations to make the house feel festive inside and out.

All was going well. There were no erroneous odors eliminating from my bottom today like the other Sunday. The BOY was in a great mood and well I was feeling rather light from my new haircut and the day was like a Triple D (Dandy Doodle Day).

We pulled up to the Home Décor store and unloaded. The BOY, GIRL, and I jumped out of the car eager to get inside. The large glass doors opened as we neared the entrance and there is was. The 12 foot green, mean ,orange faced ,long clawed monster, who if ever got ahold of the BOY or GIRL would chew them up, claw them to bits and pieces, and throw them out.

orange head

I immediately went into Doodle Action.

I showed my teeth, I put my hair up. I braced my hind feet so I was prepared for any blow from that monster and then I let out my meanest, hardiest, Doodle bark, I could manage. It was so loud and vicious that I actually frighten myself the GIRL and the BOY. They both jumped like they had no idea what was going on and yelled at me for doing my job.

WHAT THE HECK….ARE THEY BLIND? DO THEY NOT SEE THE DANGER?

And why the heck is the BOY yelling at me to STOP BARKING…..HELLO I’m protecting here. Now the GIRL….DOODLE, STOP IT.

The GIRL is now dragging me around the corner, from the beast that I am protecting them from, only to bump into the U-GLEE EST lady I have ever seen with a wart on her nose and she starts talking to me and I once again go into vicious DOODLE PROTECTION MODE.

ugly woman

BOY: Doodle stop barking. No barking Doodle.

GIRL: Boy, I think he is afraid of those things.

BOY: I DON”T CARE …..DOODLE STOP BARKING. SHUT UP

BOY:  I gotta stop saying that.

GIRL: Boy, you don’t need to yell at him.

BOY: YES, I DO. DOODLE STOP BARKING.

ME: BARK, BARK, BARK, I’LL RIP YOUR CLAWS AND THAT UGLY FACE OFF IF YOU COME NEAR US. BARK

In walks Mr. Store Manager. “Excuse me ma’am. We have an open policy about pets and yes I see he is a service dog, but we can not have him upsetting the customers or disrupting the store.”

BOY: SHUT UP DOODLE…OH I GOTTA STOP SAYING THAT.

GIRL: Sir, I am sorry, yes he is a service dog and I just think this stuff is giving him a fright.

ME: Bark, BARK

BOY: SHUT UP DOODLE…OH I GOTTA STOP SAYING THAT

ME: BARK BARK….what the heck is wrong with these people. These things are gonna kill them.

BOY: SHUT UP…..OH I GOTTA STOP SAYING THAT

MANAGER: OK, ma’am you need to get them both under control. I understand so can I help with anything?

GIRL: No thank you . Doodle come on let’s go, Boy stop saying that.

ME: Alright, we made it by those monsters.

BOY: Phew that was horrible.

GIRL: Yes, it was.

BOY: Doodle when I say no barking you are supposed to ZIP IT. Get it?

ME: If they only knew what I just fought off for them.

GIRL;  is it cocktail time?

The GIRL, the BOY and me moved away from those monsters. I must have scared the crap out of those monsters because they didn’t move. I’m strutting NOW. OH YEAH, whose the KING of DOODLES.

the GIRL quickly got some things for the house and we checked out to head home. Did I do something wrong. What’s a doodle to do?

Be kind support autism peace hugs love a doodle.

 

Take that Comment and Shove it

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When you have a child with a disability sometimes people say the dumbest things.

PEOPLE…… do yourself and the family you are about to open your mouth to……………just don’t say anything.  You are ANNOYING..

Here are just a couple that make the  GIRL crazy………

Oh don’t worry I understand.

This makes us roll on the floor laughing. They DON’T have a clue and if you ask them if they have ever spent time with someone with autism, they would probably say, no.

The GIRL would like to say, “oh, that makes me so happy, listen I need someone to take care of him for a couple of days so I can get away and you seem to really understand, what days would work best for you, and oh the doodle can come too. He knows how to calm him down when he starts smashing the walls.”

Where will he live when he grows up?

Really. Why does it matter to them and all it does is make the parent feel horrible because it reminds them that once again their child will always need support and what will happen to them when they are gone.

The GIRL would like to say, “oh, I’m so glad you asked. His attorney for his guardianship tells us to find people who may be interested to have him live with them. You seem to be very interested. Thank you so much for asking.”

Will he ever be able to…………………?

Don’t ask this. It’s a horrible thing to ask a parent and a parent doesn’t know for sure until that time comes. Miracles do happen and things change. The GIRL never thought the BOY would be able to shave himself. He does GREAT and is always clean-shaven.

The GIRL would like to say, “I wonder if you will ever be able to learn not to ask such a stupid ass question.”

What is he good at?

Oh, this one knocks my tail off. Many still think of the movie ‘Rain Man’ and that all people with autism are savants in one area.

The GIRL would like to say, “at driving his mother to consume large quantities of wine in one sitting, but don’t worry, I’m in AA now so we are just taking one day at a time.”

Yes, this autism thing is really getting big isn’t it?

Stupid, dumb and dumber thing to say. Yes, ma’am it’s 1 out of 68 now and guess what the BOY is one.

The GIRL would like to say, “Just what the heck do you mean by that. Are you dumb or dumber?”

So, what does he do for fun?

Lady, do you really care….NO, so don’t ask.

The GIRL would like to say, “Oh he hangs out at the corner bar every night. That’s why we bought the house we did near that bar so he could walk home.”

Can he do anything on his own?

Why, don’t you get the salt out and just rub it in the cut. This has to be the absolute most horrible thing to ask someone.

The GIRL would like to say, “oh yes, he can destroy a house in about 10 minutes. What day did you say that brunch was at your house?”

You know… my niece, or is that my 2nd niece, in Allygoodville works with those types of kids?

What, I can’t believe I just heard that ‘those type of kids.”

The GIRL would like to say, “GREAT, why don’t you write her name , number and address down so I can send her another one of ‘those kids.”

We can go on and on and on and on, just like the BOY. Feel free to share one of those comments that you would like to say, “take that comment and shove it.

Here is the bottom line……………Speak the truth, don’t act like you know the answer if you don’t, always think how that question would make you feel it you were a parent of a child that required additional supports and ALWAYS abide by the Thumper Rule. IF YOU DON’T HAVE SOMETHING NICE TO SAY, DON’T SAY ANYTHING AT ALL.

Oh, another fast favorite, “oh I’m sure he’ll grow out of it.” Lady, he’s 25 …when do you think that will happen. You maven moron.

Feel free to leave one….

The Police Pulled us Over

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OK, so I told you I would share the police story of the GIRL and the BOY with you and I think today is the PeRFecT day to do that. I’m feeling tuckered right out. I went to play Frisbee golf with the BOY and the Other Boy. I ran around like a chicken without their head.

It was a hot day somewhat like today. The GIRL had just picked the BOY up from his school and they had just finished with the usual stops at the grocery store, bank and post office (we didn’t have all these apps like today). The BOY was not in a happy mood. He wanted to be home long before they were on their way.

He was probably 4. At that time at the age of 4 a child’s seat was not required. He had to be buckled in but no child seat. Yes, I know the times have changed. The GIRL had a 4-door sedan type car.

Getting the BOY to stay in a seat belt was always a challenge. Getting the BOY in any seat was a challenge. The GIRL felt the BOY was the best Houdini she ever met. He could get out of anything in 3 seconds flat. If she knew the drive ahead was 20 minutes she would almost double the time to get to point B because she knew she would be pulling over every couple of minutes to lock the BOY back in his car seat or seat belt. If she left him out he would win and think he didn’t have to buckle up.

On this day the girl was exhausted. In the proceeding 3 nights she probably got about 12 hours total sleep. She was tired, cranky and over the top with autism. They were ¼ mile or less from home. She could feel home and maybe get a wink in because the BOY’s father should be home.

Click, snap.

There he is standing in the middle of the 2 front seats straddling the hump in the back seat like a cowboy riding a new horse with tight jeans bouncing side to side. The look on his face was one of triumph escape joy. The GIRL said to herself, I don’t care. I can crawl home and I am not pulling over one more time. Let him straddle that hump.

WRONG…………the red lights and the piercing sound was ringing in her ears and reflecting off of her mirror.

She pulls over. I think you should be aware the car clearly spells out autism on it. The vehicle’s license plate clearly distinguishes there is either someone in the car with autism or that the owner of the vehicle is very close to someone with autism.

The officer walks up to the window and says, “Ma’am do you know why I am pulling you over.” Being cranky and tired the GIRL thinks in her head DUH….no let me see….you wanted to ask me what was for dinner?

The GIRL very politely says, “Yes, officer, I am sorry, we have been on the road for about 15 minutes and I’ve already re-buckled him at least 8 times. I’m tired and cranky and just want to get home. We are having a very autistic day”

Officer: “I understand, I have kids of my own. Do you mind if I have a talk with the BOY.”

GIRL: doing her very best acting to withhold her wanting to laugh so hard right in his face routine, very lady like says nooooooooooooo, NOT at all. She places her finger on the rear window button to put it down. She wanted to make it much easier for the officer to have this conversation with her son. It was a pleasure he wanted to venture there………..

Officer: “ Hi son, I’m your friend…..I’m a police officer….you need to wear your seatbelt and stay in it. Do you know why?”

With that the BOY dives to the floorboard on the opposite side of the car and starts to dig feverishly on the carpet and yells, “I don’t want to die, let me out. I want to live.” (in case you don’t know that is what Wilbur the pig says in Charlotte’s Web).

Officer looking rather perplexed. “Son, son, now calm down. I am your friend. No need to be afraid. You need to wear that seatbelt. It’s a safety precaution. Son, let me explain, I am your friend.”

BOY: “no, no, no, please, I DON’T WANT TO DIE. I WANT TO LIVE.”

Officer: “Son now listen to me. Just focus on my voice. You are fine. You will be fine. Just relax, blah, blah, blah.”

The GIRL is sitting in the front, sit as stiff as a board. Her knuckles are white because she is gripping the steering wheel so hard and the tears are rolling down her eyes.

Her stiff body is starting to jiggle and she is trying her hardest to not allow any sounds escape her mouth and tries even harder to keep her body stiff form jiggling like the jolly old man in red.

She is LAUGHING AND LAUGHING AND LAUGHING …He want’s to talk to him………………Controlling her silence and rigid body is becoming a difficult task.

Couple of minutes of the BOY continuing to dig and escalate the officer comes back up to the front window. The GIRL tries to quickly wipe the tears of laughter away.

Officer: “Ma’am”

GIRL: “yes”

Officer: (shaking head) “is there any medication to give him?”

GIRL: “Officer if there was something that would work I would probably have him on it.”

Officer: “Where do you live”

GIRL: “right over there (she points to the subdivision across street)

Officer: “OH, THERE, well heck he’s fine. You just get home and ma’am…well…umm. Ma’am..yeah..uh…best of luck to you.”

GIRL: “Thanks officer, we may need it some days.”

The BOY is not good with back and forth communication. He has always had language but does not communicate well. He has always used scripts from movies however, the good thing is he has always used them in appropriate context. Till today he will do this. Sometimes you have to stop and think what is this person really trying to tell me and most important to remember is BEHAVIOR IS A FORM OF COMMUNICATION. 

Today the BOY always buckles up and reminds everyone in the vehicle to buckle up. Even me. Guess all those pull-overs worked.

 

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